Yesterday was the strangest day. All day it felt like Friday, and I wasn't the only person to feel that way or say so. Really though, it was Monday, and really, I'm glad that it was Monday instead of Friday. If it were Friday, I probably would have been leaving instead of spending my whole evening with the Duttons again. I know that I need to finish my final. I know that I need to pack. I know that I am moving away and I need to get settled into my new place quickly before everything starts up. I know that I need to stop being sad about it. And I need to accept that life is moving on, and this time, again, I will be moving with it. Litterally.

When I get discouraged about the changes life is bringing, I should look at the big picture. I am changing too. I am moving towards goals that I've worked for a long time to accomplish. I'm making something of myself and my life. But it's so easy for me to see instead, everything that I want to become, and feel that I should already be, that I'm not. That probably just has a lot to do with how I see myself... might be something good to work on.

Yesterday felt really wierd too, because I was entirely unproductive for most of the day. I went to sleep very late Sunday night because my roommate and her boyfriend were in the living room, and I just couldn't fall asleep until he left... at least partly because I was afraid that he wouldn't leave. Monday morning I worked at the butt-crack of dawn (okay, it was BEFORE dawn because it's winter and it takes the sun a long time to come up right now). But I was really tired, so when I came home from work at 9am, I laid back down and watched more Heroes. I'd kept myself awake Sunday night watching several episodes, and then spent my entire morning yesterday watching more. It's another one of those shows that's addictive to me, but at the same time, another one that kind of leaves me feeling dark. Ugh. Why is it always that kind of show that reels me in? I have a goal to not watch Heroes at all today. I've got way to much that I still need to do.
1. I should hurry up already and finish my final. The semester's over, but I'm not going to get a grade in my technology class until I submit my final. And if I did, I'd just have to chant the mantra: "C's get degrees." over and over. Because I would still get a C. 2. I need to move this week. This means that I need to pack. This means that I need to get everything cleaned. And it means that I can't keep procrastinating, because I've got to rely on others to help me out. 3. There are books that I want to read. There is my journal that's been highly neglected for months. There are people I want to visit with before I'm gone, or they are. I need to priortize so that my life can be productive and joyful. So, for this morning I'm done.