Thoughts from a "Great-Grandma"

I found some WONDERFUL thoughts from my (mission) Great-Grandma. As I read them, it made me feel like she and I are kindred spirits. That is the same thing that I felt the first time that I actually met this amazing girl, while I was still a missionary in Pennsylvania, and she was back to visit. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing some of the thoughts that she shared, that touched me.

Go and Do: Fighting Spiritual Atrophy

10:01am Sunday, May 27, 2007
I know I said that I would post the talk I gave last week, but it is not yet coherent in written form . I usually write half of my talk and ramble for the rest. It needs some help! Here is a talk I gave in January to tide you over.
When I gave this talk the Bishop had asked me to speak on "whatever I thought the ward needed to hear". Ah! Talk about pressure! So I wrote it down. I had never written out a whole talk before. This is what came out: Go and Do! Fighting Spiritual Apathy
There is a story that I once heard about Socrates. A young man came to him near a lake and asked Socrates to teach him how to acquire wisdom. Socrates grabbed the man and plunged his head under the water. As the young man struggled for his life, Socrates continued to forcibly hold him under the water. Finally, Socrates let him up to breathe, and when the man, gasping for breath, asked why Socrates nearly drowned him, Socrates replied, “When your desire for wisdom is as great as your desire to breathe, then you will find wisdom.”
There is a scripture that most of us know and many of us can even sing that is found in 1 Nephi 3:7. In it, Nephi declares “I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded.”He had no questions, no reservations. I am sure that his desire to follow the Lord was greater even than his desire for breath.
I wonder if we can say the same thing. I know that I want to serve the Lord, but I often wonder if that desire is being manifested through my actions. We cannot simply have a desire gain to spiritual wisdom and expect to learn all the mysteries of Heaven. We must go and do, we must act on that desire and prove ourselves worthy to receive the knowledge and blessings that the Lord has planned for us.
Today, we are facing an epidemic of spiritual atrophy. So many members know that the gospel is true, but they don’t know the gospel. In John 17:3 we read that “…this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom though hast sent.” Not that “they may believe in God”, but that they might know him. And the only way to truly come to know the Lord is to follow him. I believe that one of the most profound sermons the Savior ever taught was delivered in 3 simple words. “Come follow me.” We must learn of Him and do his will. Many have received a witness that the gospel is true but they haven’t paid the price for the privilege to live the gospel. Have you ever through about it that way? It takes sacrifice, but it is a privilege. A privilege to not hang out too late or to end a date early so you won’t get into trouble, to turn off the T.V. if the programming isn’t appropriate, to leave the dance if it gets a bit too crazy, to get to bed early, to get up early, to admit you were wrong, or perhaps to forgive someone who has wronged you. If we don’t live up to these privileges, how can we ever expect to receive the blessings that have been promised us?
I know that, at least for me, there was a time when I was younger that being strictly obedient was a great deal easier. No, I will not drink coffee. No, I will not watch an R rated movie. But now, even though things are still just as black and white as they ever were, Satan has convinced us to see them as gray. We are bombarded on every side, every minute of every day with sins that have become normal and acceptable. We are exposed to R rated material everywhere we look: on T.V, on the internet, in video games and we have begun to think that being desensitized equals being strong and when we think that we let our guard down.
In October Conference of 1986 Gordon B. Hinckley said, “We cannot be unclean and expect the help of the almighty. You cannot afford to partake of things that will weaken your minds and your bodies…You cannot do these things and be valiant warriors in the cause of the Lord. We are engaged in a great eternal struggle that concerns the very souls of the sons and daughters of God. We are not losing. We are winning. We will continue to win if we will be faithful and true. We can do it. We must do it and we will do it.”
This valiant attitude reminds me of one of my favorite Book of Mormon heroes, Captain Moroni. He was so faithful, so dedicated, so passionate. He was strictly obedient. He knew that was the only way his people could survive, only if they were obedient to the commandments of the Lord. We know that although he did not delight in bloodshed he had sworn an oath to defend his people, his rights, and his country, and his religion, even to the loss of his blood. He would not be still and watch his people be over come by the powers of evil. He never rested. He fought always for peace and religious freedom. Even in times of peace Moroni fortified cities, and built up defenses. We too must build up our defenses; we must fight as Captain Moroni fought.
I often think that living in Utah Valley gives us the illusion of living in peace. We have our testimonies, but we don’t necessarily feel the need to fight for them, or to fight for those that we love. “We are all Mormon here; we will be ok, right?” It becomes so easy to turn into a spiritual couch potato. Life gets busy, school, work, friends, finding an eternal companion. These things take time. So we justify. Perhaps we leave church early, skip the temple for a week, or a month, or a year, or maybe we don’t do our home or visiting teaching. It’s not that important right? Well, I can do this, it isn’t really wrong and it is just for now. And soon laziness turns into forgetfulness.
When I was serving my mission in Delaware we saw the effects of this behavior. There were several very good families who had come to the US from Mexico to work and earn money for their families. They would work every Sunday and soon missing church led to missing scripture study, FHE, prayers, and they began to forget. We would review the story of Joseph Smith and they would strain to try and remember just how the story went. If we don’t use what we have been given it will atrophy and it will die. Then we are left defenseless. Today the enemy is ruthless and just as relentless and just as real as the one Captain Moroni and his people faced. My dear Brothers and Sisters this is not casual warfare and this is definitely not a time of peace. I wonder if we would stand still for a moment, if we could see how the hosts of the enemy are tearing down those around us. The slaughter is immense. We must not stand idly by! Let’s give our all to the Lord. Don’t be afraid. I promise you that He will care for you. He will bless you in school, at work, in your social life. It doesn’t have to happen all at once but you can start today. And it is alright if it makes you a little bit different. Neal A Maxwell once said, “Be different from the world to make a difference in the world.” I might even add “Be different from the world to make a difference in your world.”
I know that as we follow the Lord he will bless and defend us and those that we serve and love. I love this gospel, I love the Lord and I love each one of you. I know this church is true and I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.


What have I been missing? Part II

12:29am Sunday, Jun 3, 2007
Another thought from institute:If the Lord knows that the very trial you are facing is the one that you will need for exaltation, He will not take it from you.He loves you too much. I have heard this one before. Still, every time I hear it, it hits me so deeply. At first I don't know if I should feel complemented, or sigh and resign myself to the horrendous process of exaltation. Then I am struck with how personal this thought is. The Lord know exactly what I need to become who He would have me be and He is not going to "save" me from that by taking away my trials. He can see the end from the beginning and knows that I will make it through, I love to look to that thought.
Supplemental material to my thoughts:
Enos 1:27(What we have to look forward to)
And I soon go to the place of my rest, which is with my Redeemer; for I know that in him I shall rest. And I rejoice in the day when my mortal shall put on immortality, and shall stand before him; then shall I see his face with pleasure, and he will say unto me: Come unto me, ye blessed, there is a place prepared for you in the mansions of my Father. Amen.
One of the best talks I have ever read. It is especially applicable to this subject:"Finding a Safe Harbor" Elder Wirthlin May Ensign 2000


What Have I Been Missing? Part III

5:22pm Sunday, Jun 10, 2007
Institute was amazing once again. I learned a lot of things this week, but what struck me the most was not something that we talked about in class. When we were reading in Matthew 15, something on the other side of the page caught my attention. I hope you don’t mind if I just walk you through some verses and the thoughts that occurred to me as I looked over them.Matthew Chapter 14 24 But the ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary.25 And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea.When the Savior walked on water, it was not on a day when the weather was calm and the water was smooth. The disciples had been rowing the better part of the night and the Savior could still walk out as far as they had gone. When Peter asked to come out to him, it was not a smooth sea that paved the way to the Savior, the wind was “boisterous” and the waves must have been high. 26 And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear.27 But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.28 And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water.I love how impulsive Peter was. It got him into trouble sometimes, but he was always so willing.29 And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.30 But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me.31 And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?“Why did you doubt yourself? I knew you could do it.”The Savior wasn’t angry, nor was he belittling Peter in anyway. He was telling him not to fear, that he could believe in himself and in his own ability. He was reminding him that with the Lord all things are possible and he need not fear his own weakness. Peter did not doubt the Lord. He asked the Lord to bid him come and he got out of the boat, in the midst of the storm, and he walked on the water. It was not until he focused on his own inability and weakness that he fell. And yet, even as he fell, he looked to the Savior and cried out for help.“Why did you doubt yourself? I knew you could do it.”As we read on, we can discover a tender moment that I think is somehow always overlooked in this story:32 And when they were come into the ship, the wind ceased.“…when they were come into the ship...” They walked back together. The Savior took him up, out of the water, and they walked back together. I have heard this story a thousand times. This time it was different. I love that.
One of my companions on my mission gave me this quote that I think it goes along well with this:“The Lord doesn’t ask us about our ability, only our availability.”
Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.


Sunset

1:21am Saturday, Aug 18, 2007
I don't think that sunsets are supposed to be hopeful. They slowly sink away into the dusk, dragging the light of day into oblivion, smothering any last spark of sunlight that would struggle to illuminate the last corners of the Earth until all is bathed in quiet moonlight. They are not supposed to be hopeful. Sunsets speak of death, not birth. And yet to me they speak of hope, as audibly as a dear friend reassuring me that the dark night is always followed by the dawn. That the sun will always rise tomorrow. We can always look to the sun. The night may be dark, it may obstruct our vision, but we can still see in the dark. We just see things differently. We can enjoy the night, we can breathe in the clean air of the madrugada(the morning hours, the twilight hours) and know that soon those same strangled rays of light that died just hours ago will find new birth as the sun rises again over the darkened skies. I see hope in the brilliant death of day. The colors, the feelings, the farewell that ignites the sky every night, even if we are not aware. I love to see the sun set.


How I Know God Loves Me

2:30pm Thursday, Sep 6, 2007
Just the other evening I was eating oranges like apples with my friends and one of said friends made a very profound comment. "Don't think I am weird,' said he, 'but this is how I know God loves me." I didn't think it was weird. I thought it was true. Sometimes the Lord shows His love is small, almost silly ways. So, since that evening (and it was not so long ago), I have been on the look out for the ways that the Lord shows me He loves me. I found one that was sillier than eating oranges like apples. It was a rigor mortised raccoon. I kid you not. I was on my way to work and I saw a little raccoon lying on the side of the road on University Parkway. The raccoon's little arm was stuck straight up in the air, so was it's leg. It was almost as if the raccoon was performing and extending his spirit fingers and toes with all his might. The whole morbidly adorable scene was perfected by the look on the raccoon's face. It's eyes and mouth were wide open and it looked like the biggest smile I have ever seen on anyone's face. When I saw that smile, I knew God loved me. I was in desperate need of a laugh that morning and if I could feel like I was cared for just by seeing a dead raccoon, I don't think it's so bad to laugh. Weird, yes, but sometimes that is just the way things go.